That annoying little voice in our head, otherwise known as the ego, does not hold our best interests at heart. It would rather we remain in a state of distress because it fears we’ll discover who we really are ~ great Beings of Love and Light! If we remembered this, the ego would then be ignored all together or not exist, so it fights to stay alive by keeping us in a state of unhappiness.
Letting go of the ego is about letting go of all negativity ~ a process worthy of much time and attention.
Joy ~ Peace ~ Love: these emotions make up our natural way of being. But how do we let go of what interferes or blocks this state? It may seem that circumstances in our life feel too heavy, or our negative thought patterns seem too persistent, for uncomfortable emotions to ever be permanently released. I believe we are not victims to our emotional states and that we do have a choice in how we feel, though it may take a bit of time to work things through.
Here are 3 steps for letting go of unwanted thoughts and emotional conditions:
1. Face it
The old expression ~ feel it to heal it ~ is a true one.
Let’s start with what won’t work:
A. Denial and suppression only internalizes the problem. Stuck energy then binds within the cells of the body causing discomfort and disease. That’s why it often takes an illness or accident to occur, to grab our attention, before we’re finally willing to slow down or make changes in our life.
B. Numbing our feelings with addictive behaviors only postpones the pain. When the comfort of feeding the addiction wears off, the problem is intensified.
C. Complaining to everyone until we can’t stand the sound of our own voice is more likely to reinforce the pain than relieve it. (Though confiding in someone we trust who can offer us empathy while also guiding us to move through it can be very valuable.)
D. Letting the mind play out games of vengeance or passing on a misfortune to others is the quickest road to karmic personal hell. This causes guilt on a subconscious level and is sure to come around to cause us more pain.
What will work:
A. Be honest about what you’re feeling. If it hurts, it hurts. Label the emotion. Are you angry, sad, or afraid? Let yourself express what you’re feeling. Cry if you need too. Yell or shake your hands if you’re in a safe place to release the energy into the air or the ground ~ or anywhere that’s not spilling it onto others. Or simply give it the attention it seeks. Once you focus on it, the energy automatically begins to dissolve.
B. Notice if there are physical symptoms that are accompanying the feeling. Is there tightness in your chest? A lump in your throat? Pressure behind your eyes? Give the physical symptom a voice of it’s own. What is the first thing it would say? “I hate my job!” “My mother drives me crazy!” “Our political system is insane!” Thank your body for the information; it is a wonderful communication device that helps us get in touch with our deeper thoughts and feelings.
C. Let the energy dissipate. Help the releasing process by taking deep breaths. Imagine a loving shower of light flowing throughout your body ~ cleansing all remnants of negative thoughts and emotions away. It’s not possible to feel peace and distress at the same time.
2. Forgive it
A. Be willing to let it go. Willingness is essential. Why would anyone want to hold on to negativity? Because familiarity is often mistaken for safety. Because blaming others is easier. Because taking responsibility for our own state of well-being is viewed as difficult if not impossible. But, making a firm decision to let it go is very necessary. Anything less, will let us dwell in the waffling phase where we enter the blame and self-pity pattern over and over again. If you’ve made that firm commitment to let go and the negative thoughts come back ~ don’t give them any attention! Say cancel and imagine drawing a line through them, or tie a helium balloon to the thought bubble and watch it drift away. Vigilance is not easy, but the undoing of the ego offers us everything we need for true happiness.
B. Be willing to hand it over to Spirit (by whatever name you call that). Believing in something or someone bigger than us calls forth a current of energy that takes us to a state of grace. Hand over all judgment of the situation, what roles people played, and what responsibility you have put on yourself for having landed in this place, to a Higher Power. Sometimes we just can’t do it alone ~ it may take a team of Angels by our side to get the job done right!
C. Be willing to release all involved including ourselves. Forgiveness is not about condoning or absolving bad behavior. It’s about recognizing that human behavior is often flawed, but even so, all of us have a bright spirit inside us that is our true identity. Someone who mistreats us is coming from a place of ego and is therefore not well. We may need to speak up about our wants and needs. We may need to set good boundaries with others or walk away entirely. But, we absolutely must stop condemning the others involved ~ in order to restore our own peace of mind.
3. Fly into Freedom
A. Find the pearl. There is always something to be learned having gone through trial and tribulation. Did you discover a strength you didn’t know existed? Did you develop a generosity of spirit? Did the negative condition move you to a new direction in life? Even if all you learned was awareness of what you didn’t want, it still can be seen as having some value. It’s much easier to let go of negativity if we can find some nugget to feel positive about.
B. Be still and let yourself feel love. Imagine a great Being of love who created you, holding you in her heart. Know that listening to the voice inside you that is peaceful and loving comes from your Spirit self, or Guides and Angels. Let yourself feel cared for. You may suddenly know the correct action, if any, to pursue. Take whatever steps you need to put yourself out of harms way. Let a healthy move forward, even if it is only one loving thought, be enough for this day.
C. Be grateful for a peaceful mind, a loving heart, and a joyful Spirit. Your positive outlook on life may bring blessings in ways you’ve never dreamed of. Creativity may awaken and blessings may be bestowed to you and all you meet!
Undoing our ego thought system is a gallant undertaking ~ be gentle with yourself along the journey to health and wholeness!
Pen Augustin is author of Waves of Light and The Priestess Tale series. She is also founder of Lady of the Lake Holistic Health. Pen loves to give messages about how we can heal ourselves and bring balance to our beloved planet. Living near the beautiful shores of Lake Michigan, she enjoys spending time in nature and communing with the local wildlife.